Something Old, Something New

Figuring out how to begin this post is proving difficult because I'm having a hard time figuring out how to explain what exactly the beginning of this year was like.  I just finished the first quarter of my third school year in Honduras -- my second working at the school in Gracias -- and it's been wave after wave of different emotions.  There are the beginning-of-the-year nerves when you're just meeting your new coworkers and students, and you're trying to figure out how to live and work with all of these new personalities.  At the same time, there's mourning over the people and familiar comforts of the previous year here.  That is followed by the excitement of the honeymoon phase where you've decided that everything is wonderful and it will be a splendid year.  Then there's a bit more mourning because feelings.  Finally, you settle into your current situation a bit and feel content.  This is right around when DEVOLSON hits.  The newness is gone, you're no longer feeling refreshed from summer break, your to-do list is growing, and things like final grades and parent-teacher conferences are looming in the not-so-distant future.  Now, a week after parent-teacher conferences, I finally feel like I have a somewhat accurate impression of this year.

Year one in Gracias was exactly what I needed after the blow of the previous school year.  I had a small, wonderful group of students, most of whom were fairly quiet and calm (with a couple of stinkers to keep things fun).  By chance, I ended up with the best roommate I could have asked for.  All of the American teachers bonded, and we provided a strong community of support for each other.  This year is different.  While I once again have a wonderful group of students whom I love, my kiddos are helping me sharpen my management skills quite a bit more than my first class.  Despite that challenge, I feel much more comfortable in my work.  I know the curriculum, I have accumulated a lot of supplementary resources, and I'm generally much happier with the way my classroom works.  Life outside of my job is also drastically different.  I haven't gelled the same way with anyone nor felt part of a strong community the way I did before, so I've dealt more with loneliness.  However, the fact that I don't immediately hop on over to someone else's house when my roommates are busy also has helped me slowly become more and more comfortable with functioning on my own.  That's something I was not ready for when I first moved to Honduras almost three years ago, but the sum of my experiences since then has made this an adjustment that I feel good about.  This change is also causing me to realize that I need to lean more on the One who brought me here in the first place.

Ultimately, this year seems to be one full of opportunities for growth -- personal, professional, and spiritual.  My unceasing hope for the year is that I use the wisdom to seize those opportunities rather than using all my energy to mourn what this year is not.